Sunday, May 30, 2010

Fist Of Fear, Touch Of Death

Fist Of Fear, Touch Of Death (1980) 0*

Cast: "Bruce Lee" (Stock footage),  Fred Williamson, Bill Louie, Ron Van Clief, Aaron Banks, Adolph Caesar

Directed by Matthew Mallinson

They really don't get any worse than this.  I mean if there is a movie out there worse in terms of quality, cheapness and absurdity I for sure will give up movies all together for this movie is an abomination to the eyes of a viewer.  The plot if one really wants to know (and trust me there really isn't much of one)  surrounds the "fascinating" evening that will take place as a martial arts tournament is taken place to find a successor to Bruce Lee.   What makes things even more ridiculous is that the stars of the film such as Fred Williamson, Van Clief and Caesar (near the end) openly say what all the viewers are thinking in how such a tournament is completely ridiculous.  It's almost as if the director heard a tournament was taking place, got his hands on some Bruce Lee stock footage and then somehow got some martial artists and got Fred Williamson and Adolph Caesar and threw it together into this jumble of crap.   Williamson and Caesar are decent actors but there is no way they can save this movie,  indeed one gets the impression that Bruce Lee and Fred Williamson team up to fight bad guys (which would sort of be cool)  but this waste of time is a huge lesson in exploitation.   There are some laughs mainly how they refer to Lee's Jeet Kune Do style as "Karate"  which is a Japanese style but that isn't even the half of it as we learn Lee's grandfather was a samurai.  I can't even explain how mind bogglingly awful Fist Of Fear Touch Of Death is. There just aren't enough words in the English language.

 The worst part is how it insults the intelligence of the viewer who has even mildly enjoyed a Bruce Lee movie. We hear Bruce Lee's grandpa was a samurai.(The fact that samurais were from Japan and Bruce Lee is Chinese not withstanding) Just adds to the overall stupidity. Oh and then we get footage of Bruce Lee explaining to his mother that he beats people up because of his tradition of his samurai grandfather, what makes this movie so unbelievably bad is that this footage is shot like a soap opera and is then spliced in with a bad samurai movie. Actually I take that back the samurai movie maybe indeed good but taken in this direction it just shows adds up to the overall futile surroundings. Williamson is wasted, the tournament footage is lackluster and the Bill Louie cameo is just unbelievably stupid. This is without a doubt the worst movie I've ever seen and one that I'm pretty sure will be the worst in a lifetime of bad movies watched.

2 comments:

  1. I'm really glad you reviewed this one. I've been meaning to too, since I added the Wild Card post to the format, I just keep forgetting. Bruce Lee's grandfather was a samurai...

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  2. Maybe if watched in a group this might be hilarious and fun to mock. It's a possibility that I'm not brave enough to try. Also the way constantly refer to Bruce Lee's Jeet Kune Do style as Karate. There was a hilarious eye gouging scene but aside from that...

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